All good things come to an end

Well today was the day that my family said good-bye to Mikko, the last of the finns. We said good-bye to Maarit and Antti on Tuesday. I am not including Jussi as we are going to be seeing him some time later this year, when exactly I don't know as this is up to the Lord!
So ends this part of the journey, this season in my life. I have to say that it has been a blessing having them here. God has really been blessing me through their presence. Though there were some very tough moments along the way. But I guess it is just learning to be in the Kingdom to be open and honest with each other. It is something that I am not too good at, I am open when I want to be open.
However I think the Lord is wanting me (and the church) to learn to become transparent with others. Which as I said before is not something I do naturally, so I guess I am going to have to learn to lean on Jesus for help in this!

Finally, part 3, I hope I haven't bored you too much

Well on sunday night it was a wonderful time of just free worship and also having Antti free to play the piano was wonderful. And as he was playing I just felt to go and sit near him and to pray for him as he played. And after I while I felt that I should go and lay my hands on his shoulders. But I just pass this off as my own thoughts and that it would be distracting. However after alittle while later I just felt the the Lord say 'just go and put your hands on him' it was said in such a simple, gentle and loving way that I knew that it was the Lord.
So it was great to hear the Lord in such a clear way, it has been awhile! Also we had a time of interceding for the city of Logan, now if you know me you know that I have a tendenacy to pray out loud and to pray loudly. However I have not had a liberty in my spirit to do this in a long while. So during this time I was able to do what I like to do, pray out loud and loudly!!
And the night was ended with Antti being prayed for by everyone who was at the sunday night!

It is still taking me awhile (part 2)

Well I just deleted a large post as I thought this is too large! And thought I will just keep it short and sweet. On sunday my pastor preached on God's appointed times and dealing with the disappointed that comes when this appointments that God has given us take their time to happen or when things come in the way of the appointment.
And when the altar call was given I knew I had to get out there to deal with it. And as I was on the floor on my knees I found myself calling out (quietly) to God for my heart back. As my heart had become hard and bitter because of things (long story) that had happened to cause me to feel/think that the things God had placed in my heart would never come to pass. But God through my time with the Finns had soften my heart enough to realise that God could re-appointment. So my time on my knees was taking the healing process to the next phase.
And it was a good time, as ny eyes started to fill with tears, which is something that hasn't happened in awhile. So it was good to start to get my heart back!

I know it has taken me awhile...(part 1)

But as they say better later than never! Though it will be hard to remember all that happened last sunday, especially considering I am feeling tired from my rest days :) at the beach with my Finnish friends (this is for another post). But I guess it will mean that the important stuff will be talked about, the stuff that has touch my heart and is now a part of me!
I have to say that my mind was a bit distracted at the start of sunday morning as I was concentrating on something that I was going to do for my Finnish friends, Maarit and Antti. I will get to that later, but I have to say that the worship at the beginning of the service, just blew me away. The passion and the power of it was just amazing, two songs and we were straight into the throne room. I can't try to explain it as that would diminsh it as it is something to be experienced. I felt guilty, as I felt that I was interupting something special and powerful, when mum (the worship leader) started to introduce me, but what happened next was just as powerful, but in a different way.
Now I was going to introduce the finns (easier to type that than my finnish friends Maarit and Antti :)) to the church. But I had something more planned, which was what I was concentrating on. As it was on my heart to bless Maarit and Antti, for them to feel like this is home, that they are loved, that they belong, you know all that good stuff. As I know that they don't really get that in Finland.
So I had decided to give them an "old" finnish traditional welcome, which I have learned is not that old! It is where you get new people to the group to stand up and for everyone else to come in and give them a big group hug. So I was concentrating how can I get this done in a church context, and by God's grace it worked out. Which I am so grateful for as I think I would have been devestated if it had worked out.
I can still remember Antti's body language as people were come out to welcome him. It was like a child trying to hide in a corner but having no corner to hide in. And I can remember one of the woman in my church coming up to Antti and kissing him on the cheek in a loving motherly way, it was beautiful and very special to me. It gives me warm feelings just thinking about it. And it had a real sense of family about it, so as I said it was powerful but in a different way. To see this mass of people all close together as family and to see my dear friends in the middle of that. It was great! Thankyou Jesus!
I think I am going to have to leave it here as a part one and write I think another 2 parts.

A tour of the high places

I should get on with talking about what happened over the weekend. So I will start with saturday for this post and move to sunday on my next post. The picture is of two of the "mountains" that make up the Glasshouse Mountains in Queensland. I took Maarit, Michelle (my sister's friend from Church) and Antti up to see this site as I know that it has a significance to the Aboringinal people. So knowing that Maarit had an interest in the aboriginal people I thought it would be a good place to go.
It turned out to be a good time up on the "mountain", it was good to see Maarit and Michelle starting to get to know each other. And to just enjoy each others company!
In the evening it was up to Mt coot-tha, a small mountain that overlooks the city of Brisbane, to see the lights of the city and to go and pray. After seeing the lights, we went to a park away from all the people to pray. The park we went to was the park where the Youth Arise monthly prayer times started off again after a long hiatus. I just felt to come back here to pray, especially for youth arise.
But I didn't know that god had other plans!! Now the prayer time was one where no one is really praying. So I thought there are things on my heart to pray, not major burdens, just things I felt to pray for. Plus I had that feeling of responsibility that i had "dragged" these guys up here, so someone should start the ball rolling! However after alittle while, Antti asks Maarit what does she think. And then Maarit replies that she feel s we should pray for me, to which Antti replied he felt the same way.
Now I can tell you that I wanted to go and hide, from all this attention. And it isn't like I can say "mmmm no I don' t think so". They gathered around me and started to pray and to pray and to pray and to pray and to..... you get the picture. They kept pn praying, and I have to say that I don't really know what they were praying as they were doing it either in tongues or in Finnish. But it was weird as there was no real response in my spirit to what they were prayer, I mean like there was no tears or anything. However this was to get me ready for Sunday which is a post I will get to later!

Some of the most toughest days of my life!

Well I have to say that the last few days have been very tough on me, emotionally speaking. As the dynamic with Maarit and Antti was about to change as their friends Jussi and Mikko were coming back from the Solomons.
So I knew in my heart that the dynamic of which I had enjoyed was about to change. And this change was weighing heavily on my heart. I guess it is hard to describe here - the fear of being the outcast again as it was when I was at school was welling in my heart.
Which in turn started to cause my heart to harden, in a defence to this "imaged" isolation. So I found myself in this wrestle, trying to keep my heart from being harden once again and with the fear of being isolated once again. So I have to say that my heart has been pulled this way and that way. I still find it so hard to be open and transparent! Even to the point where I need to turn to a computer journal to express my battles!
So it has been tough couple of days!

A challenging day

Today was definitely a challenge! As I took Maarit, Antti and my sister Jane down to Musgrave park. Now Musgrave park is a significant piece of land for the Murri people. The Murri people is the name given to queensland indigenous people. I didn't know this until I read some information that Maarit had downloaded of the net. It is because of Maarit that we went to this park. And to be honest when Maarit contacted Antti about going to Musgrave park, last night, and Antti tell me I was hit with this great amount of fear. So I had to keep laying this at His feet and asking for His help for the next day.
And God always provides!! First we spent sometime praying for the indigenous people and for me what came out was the truth that it was white people that caused the indigenious people to become the alcoholics that alot of them are. Also I had to keep asking the Lord to give me His heart for these people. Even as I write this I am amazed/shocked at my apathy towards these people. So I know that the Lord has some work to do on my heart! But I know that it has to be done as the church is about reaching out to those least fortunate, to the poor, to the widow, to the orphan.
And if we want the Kingdom the kingdom takes care of the hurting, the lonely, the drunken, the lost!!

A time of prayer

Today was a time spent in prayer, I guess that is why I titled this post as "A time of prayer" :) It was a good time but also something that I am not used to and found it hard at times to connect with God and to stay focused on God.
See in this time of Prayer, Paul, my pastor, had us trying free worship and prayer. Which means there was just music playing and you could sing along with the music, make up your own words to the music or pray through things that the Lord was laying on your heart. Now this is a very different way, as I am used to coming in as a group and having singing songs that I know reasonable well and then flow into pray as the Spirit takes over. However in this time of prayer some of the, actually most of the, songs I didn't even know. Then there was the times where it was either Antti playing on the piano or Marty play on the guitar. And when I say playing, they were playing just music as they felt led to play. So this was very very different.
Also another thing I was battling was my concern for Maarit and Antti. I was worrying "are they getting thing out of this", "are they bored", "are they sensing that we should go on a different track but didn't want to rude". So I had to wrestle against these doubts and concerns.
However though it was a wrestle, it was a good wrestle. As I have been suffering a lack of confidence in praying out loud in a group, actually I would say just praying. So I had to force myself to pray, especially when one of the local pastor came to be prayed for. And then later on I had a small burden to pray for the nations of the world and especially the nations of Europe.

Wet and Wild

Had a wonderful time yesterday with my friends Antti and Maarit, we went to wet and wild the loocal water park here in Queensland. And one of the best things is I didn't get badly sun burnt afterwards, so I am not wincing with pain as I type! Once we had finished there it was off to delicious ice cream! Finally our day finished with the Bethlehem Experience, this is a production done by the local churches of The gold coast, please note the plural - churches!
This production is a tour of the city of Bethlehem at the time of Christ's birth with real animals and sand spread over the place, beggars calling out and soldiers tell you to march on. It takes you through the Christmas story but it doesn't end there! They then present the gospel, of Chris dying on the cross for our sins. This is what really blew me away, that they didn't just tell the nice christmas story with baby Jesus, they brought it to the point why baby jesus had to come and to grow up to become our sacrifice!!

The Finns have arrived

Well today is a good, maybe I should say that yesterday was a good. This is because today is not yet over and that yesterday my two friends from Finland arrived here in Brisbane. They are here sent by God to pray and to journey with Jesus, at least this is what they tell me! :) But it is good to have them here, I have to admit that with them coming I have been thinking alot about my trip to Finland and all the wonderful people who are back there!
Also this is going to be interesting as Antti(one of my Finnish friends) is also post a blog about his journey. So what might be a good day to him, I might see as a bad day and visa versa. So it will be interesting to read his different perspective as things go through the time they are here!
But I would like to Thank God for sending them here, as I know it will be a blessing to me if not to those they meet!