Time to break the silence

Well I think it is now time to talk, as I can only stay quiet for so long. Well the main reason I guess for going quiet, is this dissatisfaction. As I feel like I received a blessing from the Finns who visited but I had not broken into the heavenlies, if that makes any sense. So I decided to fast the internet as one way to breakthrough. But I found myself still getting on the net(but with no comdemnation, as if it was alright to do this), but I have to say that I wasn't spending as much time as I was and also I was not drawn to certain sites. These certain sites were not bad but the fruit it produced in me was bad.
So I feel a sense of release to 'get back' on the net, even though I never really left! But I have to say that there is a growing peace in my heart, which I know is God. I think it has to do with my attempts to meditate (it is funny how I wince at using that word), to grow in this holy discipline. Though I have to say I am very much the novice. I say this as I can't wait to be able to sit in my beanbag (my place of meditation) and not find myself waking up from having dozed off.
But the journey is fun and I guess in the napping God is doing something in the secret, don't ask me what, just know that He is doing something!

Deepen my sense

Reading a book with prayer sand meditations on the book of Romans. And a sentence from the first prayer has caught my attention and my heart.

Deepen my sense that, in the gospel, I have something to live up to, a great purpose to be inspired by, something larger than myslef to which I am duty-bound and from which I may derive direction and energy for living.

Deepen my sense, Lord!

Many thoughts

I am reading through a book called "Becoming conversant with the Emerging Church" by D. A. Carson, I got it for Christmas. As I said that this blog was going to be about my journey with the Bride, and it has so far been more about me. But I guess its just it is all part of the journey, as I am part of the bride.
So reading this book has started alot of thoughts and questions, and unfortunately I can't remember them. But I want to share something that happened when I was surfing the net, starting at Marc blog. And I came across this story about these servants of the Lord (as they are not missionaries in the usual sense of the word) reaching out to Native Americans. And they shared about how they "do" church in this culture. And I found myself thinking, briefly, that is wrong, they're theology is wrong. It was like a knee jerk reaction.
It just goes to show that I have along way to go with this whole new 'thing'!

Good start to a new year

It was a good start to the new year! For new year's eve, I went with a group of friends to see the movie 'The Lion, The witch and the Wardrobe" It is a very good movie and they have done it very close to the original book. Which brought me great joy, as I hate it when hollywood ruins a good book, and especially considering that the Chronicles of Narnia are part of my childhood. So it was a pleasant experience, not an epic like the Lord of the rings trilogy but still a very good movie.
I got emotional with the wrestle that Peter was experiencing. The wrestle to lead and to take up his sword and his destiny/calling. This is because it is something that I am wrestling with, to take up my sword and be who God has called me to be.
So after the movie, threee female friends and myself made the journey to Tambourine mountain to prayer in the new year. We shared some of the things that we are thankful to for what he did in the year 2005. Then we prayed these back to God and then it flowed into us laying down our desires for the new year and asking Jesus to come into this new year!
So may the Lord pour out His rich blessings on you all in this new year!